Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Women's Intuition

I was walking downtown today, minding my own business. It was very cold. Blustery, even. I had a hood on my head, and whenever I have it on, I feel as if I have tunnel vision. I looked up, straight ahead, just in time to see what looked like a fairly handsome man walking in front of me. He had on jeans that fit *ahem* very nicely. He had a nice derriere and great thick legs...well, what I could see through the jeans, anyway. He had on a nice t-shirt (is that possible) and trendy shoes.

As I'm writing this, I'm just realizing that he had no coat on. It was freezing outside!

Anyway, continuing to check him out, I noticed a ring on his right ring finger, and wondered if he was married. I made a mental note to check the other hand when I got close enough. I kept a fairly good distance behind him, as to enjoy the view a little longer. Looking at him from top to bottom, I noticed he had a banana hanging out of his left pocket.

Oh, man...imagine the set-up! I want to say something to him so bad! My first thought was, "You're wearin' them jeans!" I love to flirt with strangers. I mean, why not? My next thought, "Is that a banana in your pocket, or are you just happy to meet me?" Would that not be the perfect pick-up line?? I mean, c'mon! He had a BANANA hanging out of his pocket!

Next thing I know, we're standing next to each other waiting for a cross walk. As I approached, he took a sip of his coffee in his left hand. BINGO! Left ring finger was naked! He was CUTE, too! Buzzed hair...blonde...if you know me...well, you just know me. I really, really wanted to speak to this man. But, something in my gut told me not to. I mean, I talk to strangers all the time. I flirt with strangers all the time. There was no good reason for me not to say any of these great things I wanted to say. But, yet, as I stood next to him, I couldn't bring myself to say anything. I couldn't figure it out...it was so....unlike me.

As I walked toward the side entrance of the parole office that I support on an at least monthly basis, I noticed that he had turned the corner, and might be entering the front door of that same building...as a client. I walked into the lobby from the side door and, low and behold, guess who was going through the metal detector! You guessed it....banana boy. He had no badge on of any sort, so I knew he was, indeed, a client. A parolee, if you will.

I couldn't wait to get upstairs and tell Brian my story. I knew I shouldn't have flirted with him! Something in my gut had told me not to say a word.

Later I was helping someone on the 2nd floor, and as I turned the corner of the cube farm wall, I saw banana boy...IN HANDCUFFS, being arrested.

I'll never doubt my gut again!

2 Comments:

Anonymous Athena said...

Bummer!!!
So close and yet so far away!
Don't worry, a less criminal and equally sexy banana boy is out there just waiting for you to pick him up with a great one-liner :)

2:06 PM  
Blogger Gina said...

That is an awesome story! Always, always trust your instincts! The banana was truly an invitation for comment I do agree.

8:59 PM  

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