Friday Night Cat Blogging Introduction

I do realize that FNCB is officially old news; however, I'm just now comfortable enough with my blog to start this. And, this could possibly be the ONLY Friday night that I'll have time before midnight to do this....but here ya go.

Introducing.....SNICKERS. Snickers is my cat. She's lovely, isn't she?

I may not be able to walk on water...but I CAN walk on air....

Okay, so the week got better...as you could probably tell, if you've been keeping up on my blog. If not, I'm telling you. The week did, indeed, get better. Thank God. Drama isn't ALWAYS half-bad.

One of the reasons my week got better was a very simple thing. These shoes. They are often known as the brand name Airwalk...however, I think these are knock-offs. Either way...they are SO comfortable. I love them. And, I want a pair in every color. But for now, this is the only color I have. Did I mention how much I love them? Yeah, they ROCK. You should run out and buy a pair now. Bye...see ya later...I'll be busy walking on air now...

Warped Sense of Everything

What happens when you wake up one morning, and life sucks? Even though it doesn't, really. And, there's really no reason to feel the way you do. But you just do. And, it just does. And, to top that very unrealistic view off, you feel completely debilitated in regards to making a move to change anything about life sucking.

Do you wait for it to pass? Or, do you try to tap into that one iota of strength from somewhere deep inside of you to pull yourself out of it? Do you try to convince yourself that you shouldn't feel this way because you really DO have friends and family that love you, you really DO have plenty of money and food, not to mention a roof over your head. And, you really DO have total control over your life, even if you right now you feel like you have nothing of the sort.

The answer to all of the questions above is truly a very simple one, indeed. Are you ready for it? Here it goes: I don't know.

The ABC's of Me

I want to write, but there’s a block. But, what, you ask, about all those thoughts and feelings inside of you? Why can’t you articulate those into genius web log posts to entertain me…you might add.

Those feelings and thoughts….they surface in the strangest ways, don’t they? These are just a few, for example:

Anger: Diane Linn is doing what???? Why doesn’t she GET IT???

Boredom: Yes, I have checked each one of my e-mail accounts ONE MILLION times today. Why?

Control: Don’t put that THERE! ...because it goes HERE, that’s why. Get over it!

Doubt: Was I over-the-top too soon, Brian? I have a tendency to do that, you know...are you sure?

Empty: “We make friends with the emptiness. We begin filling it up. Ha! Ha! Ha! We never fill the emptiness!”

Fear: Please don’t jump up and down in this elevator….pleeeeze….

Guilt: I didn't know HOW wrong it was to break into houses when I was in the first grade. Can't you just picture it?

Hate: Skinny Bitches. 'Nuff said.

Itchy: I had to use the I somehow….but really, it’s just missing the B.

Jumpy: My friends tell me I have a tendency to get this way when I've had too much coffee.

Karma: Oh, it'll git'cha. Believe it. I do.

Longing: What is normal, anyway?

Mundane: Self-help books are my friend….aren’t they yours too?

Neurotic: Me, neurotic? Not me. Couldn’t be. You think so? Nah. That’s not me. Maybe I am. I’m not sure. What do you think?

Oppositional: Yes, I am 35 years old and still throw tantrums now and again. It's normal, right?

Pressure: You'll probably see my best performance at this point.

Quiet: Yeah, like that ever happens.

Rambunctious: See Unruly.

Shame: If I told you, it wouldn’t be shame, now would it???

Travesty: South Park vs. Scientology...now that's my kind of humor.

Unruly: Just ask my friends....any of them.

Vague: What do you THINK it means….?

Wasted: Not really, but I thought I’d add that in there to throw you off.

Xenophilia: You figure it out.

Yearning: Is this a woman thing, or is anyone ever really satisfied?

Zoned: Much like wasted, only it doesn't take any particular substance to make it happen. And, I do this occasionally with no help at all.

The Character

You think you're a victim?
Hold it back.
Don't talk about it.

How does one get on with life?
Get it out!
Talk about it.

Define victim.

Define life, for that matter.

Happy National Goof-Off Day Internets!

Turns out today, March 22nd, is National Goof-Off Day! I hope you enjoy your day of goofing off!

Forever My Lady

Don't ask me why. I have no clue. But, every single time that I log on to Blogger to post, or even to merely look at my blog, this song pops into my head. And I have no idea why. And, it's not that the lyrics have any relevancy...because they don't. Whatsoever.

What could this possibly mean?

Yummy Goodness

Why are these so freakin' addicting????? Someome please tell me!

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Soul

Could someone please just RE-FORMAT my hard drive, already????

Think about it. Wouldn't that be much easier? What if we could just start over with our lives and/or decisions the way we start over with, or re-format, computers?

Wouldn't that be so much easier for our wounded souls? Or, would it?

Of course it would.....

DO-OVERS!

Yes, please. Thankyouverymuch!

Walking Away

So easily forgotten.
Could it be so?
Why, oh why...
Did you have to go?

So far from my thoughts.
Far away from my dreams.
So easily forgotten?
Or, so it seems.

I thought I cared.
Not today....nor tomorrow.
Was there anything between us?
Or, merely a cover for sorrow?

I bid you farewell,
As I watch you walk away.
I distance my soul.
For that price, I simply cannot pay.

Grease Lightening!

We are attending this with Brian tonight. I'm so excited. I'm worried, however, that I may sing outloud and get up and dance right there....with all those people around me. I'm apologizing in advance, Brian...if that should happen.

Making it ALL Worthwhile

While playing with my hair as I was working on the computer, my daughter said this:

"You're such a precious mommy..."

It doesn't get much better than that. Ever.

List Number Two...Nothing at All Like Going Number Two

Top 10 reasons why I love my iPod Shuffle!

10. It enables me to load up to 250 of my favorite songs.
9. It's small and cute.
8. It came with a lanyard for easy placement around my neck.
7. It's convenient to wear around while exercising.
6. It's convenient to wear around while working.
5. Entertainment while on the toilet...is there anything better?
4. There's a certain "status" that comes with wearing any type of iPod.
3. It SHUFFLES, for God's sake!
2. I get TONS of comments EVERY time I wear it around.

And, the BEST thing I love about my iPod Shuffle......

1. I get to IGNORE everyone around me...if I want to.

Three Words

Freakin. Cat. Box.

Enslaved

I see you from the corner of my bed.
Your hateful eyes, staring at me.
Don't judge me. Love me.

Slipping through the keyhole, you come to me.
Your soul, burning with desire.

I reach for you, but feel nothing.
Cold, unfeeling. Lifeless.
Has it been taken from you, as well?

Don't you see me here? Alone and shivering? Scared?
Ahhh...finally, warmth.
The intense stirring of my heart.
Feeding my hunger, as if with a spoon.

Raw emotion. This is me. Don't you see me?
This...this is where I'm alive.
It defines me. At least, in my world.
Don't you see it?
Ah, but of course you do.

For a moment, sweet victory. But if only in my head.
Then you slip away.
Leaving me cold and terrified, once again. Crying.
All alone.

Don't you see I'm tired of being alone?
Would I leave if you begged me to follow?
How could I? I can't move. It's too heavy.
This burden. This ball and chain.

It keeps my heart captured. Alone, and weary.
In the corner of my bed. Once again.
Desolate...for one more night.

Or, what if it's really the freedom that I've longed for?
How can one tell?
Am I locked up....or really a free spirit?
Sitting there, alone. In the corner of my bed.

Everybody's a Critic

I saw Domino today. That's some HOT stuff, I tell ya. Very strange, and on the verge of obscene...but damned entertaining. I definitely recommend seeing it.

A friend suggested that I needed some crack to get through it. I asked if Mt. Dew would suffice. His response, "No. Good luck!"

I got through it. But I think I know, now, what he meant. You just have to see it. Too hard to explain.

Pretty great flick, if you ask me.

View from a Broken Hotel Window

From this view, up here
You are alone.
Roaming like a lost sheep.
Alone. Nowhere to go.

Do you belong? Anywhere?
Certainly not here.

Why, then, do you insist
On raiding my thoughts?
Constantly.

Forbidden hearts.
Forbidden dreams.
Is it worth the risk?

Wouldn't it be easier,
If you were to just go away?
Yes, please.
Leave me alone.
Forever.

No...wait...come back. Please.

Repeat Offender

I'm sick again. I hate being sick. At least this time, it's been going on long enough that I actually got some meds without too much hassle. For those of you that have had a sinus infection, you understand the ickiness I'm feeling. For those of you that haven't...be glad. It's not something you want to experience.

The worst part about this is not only do I feel awful physically, but I'm missing this. And, that bums me out. Not only was I looking forward to going for the fun of it, but it was a Birthday celebration for a good friend of mine. And, that makes me feel even worse. To top all of this off, my house is trashed more than it's EVER been. And, I have no energy or feel goods to fix it. My feel goods are busted. :-(

Positive thoughts and prayers my way, please. Thankyouverymuch!

Random Story that Probably Only Makes Sense to Me...But I'm OK With That. You?

So, I have a baby's daddy, okay? And, even though it took me forever to get over him, I finally am. And, in fact, we get along better now then we have in a long while. And, I'm actually nearly friends with his girlfriend, who, by the way, is pregnant with his child. And, I'm even throwing her a baby shower.

No, I'm in Portland, not the South. Duh.

Anyway, they are looking for a new employee at her workplace. She asked me if I knew of anyone that might be interested in this position. Instantly, after deliberating with my mom about this, we thought of my pastor's wife, who could be looking for work soon. She wasn't so sure it would be such a good fit due to the environment. It's construction work, see...and apparently, in the construction business, the language is a tad less than desirable, to say the least.

Anyhow, when she mentioned me asking the pastor's wife about the job, she referred to her as "the mother of the church." I laughed. Mostly because if you knew my pastor's wife, you'd laugh too. She's the best...but not someone you'd think of as "the mother" of any church.

Therefore, my mom and I decided the only response that would have been appropriate was, "Mother what?"

Yeah, that's funny. Possibly only to my mom and I. But still. Funny, indeed.

Neener-Neener-Neener

I don't care what anyone has to say about the Blazers...I get to go to this game on Thursday night. And, I'm excited.

We get to party in one of the suites. Compliments of a friend.

Temporary Set-backs

Okay, so this Birthday thing turned out great. HOWEVER, there was a teeny-weeny temporary set-back in the ol' financial column. Yes, there was a bit of uncontrollable spending over what is now known as not just a birth-DAY, but a birth-WEEKEND. I'm not kidding. The kid was spoiled ALL WEEKEND. And, she loved it. And, deserves it, of course.

Set-back or not, though, I'm still not anywhere in the shape I was even just a month ago, financially. I haven't spent more than I have. But, then again, I have OVER A WEEK to go before pay-day again. Ugh.

Baby-Girl Blessings

It's been a couple of days since I've updated. Things are still okay, although, today I'm not feeling very well. I've got the day off tomorrow, thank goodness. But I'm wiped tonight. I've been working hard the past couple of days.

I can't think of anything to post about. I don't think I've laughed outloud in a couple days...well, I probably have, but it's been nothing memorable. And, to be honest, I'm feeling a little lonely today. Sort of anti-social, too. Wait, is that possible...to feel both at the same time?

However, tomorrow is a special day. My daughter's 6th Birthday. And, I hope I feel better, and that I can pick up my mood. I want to make the day special...just for her. I'm so thankful for her, and everything she represents in my life. I'm the very proud mother of a beautiful little baby-girl (well, not so little anymore). I love her with all my heart. This picture was taken when she was three weeks old. Talk about precious.